A man comes to his doctor and tells him that his wife hasn't
had sex with him for 6 months. The doctor tells the man to
bring his wife in so he can talk to her. So the wife comes
into the doctors office and the doc asks her what's wrong,
and why doesn't she want to have sex with her husband anymore.

The wife tells him, "Money has been really tight for us lately,
so I got a job downtown. For the past 6 months, every morning
I take a cab to work. I don't have any money so the cab driver
asks me, 'So are you going to pay today or what?' so I take a
'or what'. When I get to work I'm late so the boss asks me,
'So are we going to write this down in the book or what?' so
I take a 'or what'.

Back home again I take the cab and again I don't have any
money so the cab driver asks me again, 'So are you going to
pay this time or what?' so again I take a 'or what'. So you
see doc when I get home I'm all tired out, and I don't want
it any more."

The doctor thinks for a second and then turns to the wife and
says, "So are we going to tell your husband about this or
what?"

Got home yesterday evening and realized I'd left the furnace on low when I left for work that morning. Since it was in the low 70's the house was pretty warm. Opened a couple of doors to air it out a little and started looking for something easy and quick to make for dinner that didn't involve turning on the oven!

Found some shrimp in the freezer, one carrot, a stalk of celery, and an onion. We always have rice and eggs, so I was in bidness!

  So, we got 1 pound of cooked shrimp (26 to 30 count), one carrot and one stalk of celery, sliced on an angle.

One medium onion sliced in half lengthwise and then into thin strips, 3 eggs scrambled well, Tomato and lemon for garnish.

Lets cook!

Three cups of cooked rice.

 I don't have a wok anymore, so I use my chicken fryer for the depth.

In 2 tablespoons of hot oil, stir fry (or as we pronounce it in America "saute") the veggies over med. high heat til crisp tender.

Remove the veggies to a bowl, add another tablespoon of oil, the three cups of rice, and cook over med heat for 5 or 6 minutes, stirring frequently. We're not trying to brown it, just drive out the moisture and add a great deal of flavor.

When done, make a crater in the center, turn heat to low, and add the eggs.

Stir the eggs a few times til set.

Reintroduce the veggies, fold every thing together with a spatula or spoon.

 Add cooked shrimp, turn heat to med. low and heat just til shrimp are hot.

 I spent my entire 21st year in Udorn, Thailand and have eaten a ton of fried rice. Shrimp, chicken, beef, pork, or combinations of all.

Every plate that I was served was garnished with tomato, lemon, and slices of cucumber. Didn't have any cukes in the house today so I did without.

I didn't miss 'em. I love 'em, but they burp me to death for days!

Garnish with some tomato and lemon, sprinkle with a little (or a lot) of soy sauce, and enjoy!

 Less than 45 minutes, feeds four, and almost no expense. Can't beat it!