WHITE WOMEN:
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.
Third date: You get to have sex but only in the missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN:
First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Third Date: You both get piss drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary: You both get piss drunk and have sex.
ITALIAN WOMEN:
First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mama Mia makes spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3 carat ring.
5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.
6th Anniversary: You find yourself a girlfriend.
JEWISH WOMEN:
First Date: You get dynamite head.
Second Date: You get more great head.
Third Date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get head again.
ORIENTAL WOMEN:
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner, nothing happens again.
Third date: You don't even get to the third date and you've already realized nothing is going to happen again.
INDIAN WOMEN:
First date: Meet her parents.
Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
Third date: Wedding night.
BLACK WOMEN:
First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date: She's pregnant by someone else.
MEXICAN WOMEN:
First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, have sex in the back of her car.
Second Date: She's pregnant.
Third Date: She moves in. One week later: her mother, father, his girlfriend,
two sisters, her brother, all their kids, her grandma,
her father's girlfriend's mother, her two cousins, her sister's boyfriend and his three kids move in
and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice,
but now looks like it belongs somewhere in
the desert along the Rio Grande with chickens and goats in the front yard.
(don't hate on me MrsHammett! I didn't write it, just thought it was funny,LOL)
Recent Comments